oh, blog. i am avoiding you....

why? why am i avoiding my blog? several reasons:

1. i don't have a digital camera anymore, and so i'm just not jazzed about posting words. which is odd. i love words. maybe i just need visual inspiration.

2. i spend enough time in front of a computer, i'm not psyched about spending more.

3. there's so much to write that i don't know where to start.

4. i'm a different person now than i was when i started this blog.

maybe the last one is the biggest reason. the other night i had a conversation with my ex boyfriend for the first time in 3 years. and it was good. actually, i insisted on a conversation. it seemed arbitrary and stupid not to talk. might as well get it over with. and it was fine. and i realized that i'm a very different me now than when i was with him. and i like who i am.

this past year has been kind of a blur, and the whole time i kept my knuckles clenched and eyes closed waiting for it all to slow down. and then it all slowed down without me ever noticing. so i'll keep you all at home informed of what's going on out here. but i don't feel the urgency. because i don't feel as alone out here as i used to. i don't feel like this blog is a voice to my only friends. i made new friends. and a new community. as a result, i don't have to blog about my life. i can tell people about my life.

which is always much more fun, if you're looking for a human reaction to, say, a date-carcrash-date night.

soon, hopefully, i'll have pictures of doug, my extremely tall...boyfriend? yikes. i guess that's what people are saying. anyway, he's GREAT. he's the BEST, in fact.

and just a few months ago i was so sure that i didn't want to be in a relationship....oops.